Starting March 15th, Canadian underwear brand UNDZ is offering $50,000 of free penis insurance with every purchase of three or more pairs of underwear via www.undz.org.
"A man can get insurance for his car, dog, house, land and life but not for his penis? Well, I thought that was absurd," said UNDZ founder Bertrand Dore. "[Now] men all over the world can protect their most valuable asset."
"That's all!?!" said some dude who thinks way too highly of himself.
Lloyd's of London, who once insured Mariah Carey's legs for one billion dollars, is backing the policies. They state that the holder's penis must be detached from the body in order for a pay out to take place. The caveat is that a close relative, friend or lover cannot have removed it. Additionally it cannot have been removed intentionally as a result of surgery.
In other words, this is pretty much the only way to get the money:
UNDZ also makes women's underwear, but is not offering vagina insurance because, in their words, "vaginas cannot be detached from the body."
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