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Peggy Lee perhaps sang it best: “Is that all there is?”
A mere three hours of televised Emmy coverage, and you’re left hanging with just the fading memory … like the phantom kiss of Bryan Cranston. But all is not lost. That bloated telecast was filled with commercial breaks of intrigue and uncensored backstage antics.
So whether you tuned in for the whole thing, starting with that first red carpet footage, or just popped in for Weird Al, The Hollywood Reporter has you covered on all the things that didn’t make it on television Monday night.
2:20 p.m. — There is fashionably late, and there is fashionably early. The award for earliest arrivals is a shared victory between Anna Chlumsky (Veep) and Melissa Rauch (The Big Bang Theory). Supporting actresses, unite!
3:46 p.m. — As you may have heard, the Emmys’ Monday move annoyed a lot of people. Jimmy Kimmel made lemonade with the sour scheduling and spared a few carbon emissions in the process. He and wife Molly McNearney avoided the traffic crunch in downtown Los Angeles by taking the subway. He tweeted the proof.
4:17 p.m. — That annoying Monday move? Actually not that annoying. Executives and talent alike on the red carpet are talking about quick commutes and easy entry in the middle of a workday.
4:35 p.m. — True Blood has been off the air for less than 24 hours, and someone is already in mourning: Ryan Murphy. “I miss True Blood,” he says on the carpet. “I love True Blood.”
4:50 p.m. — Arrivals may be easy, but a lot of actors sprinted down the carpet to get out of the heat. Those who did linger required a fanning-down by a publicist (Laverne Cox) and preinterview hydration (Viola Davis).
5:11 p.m. — The ladies of Orange Is the New Black may have time, but Emmy winners do not. The crowd is informed that the lucky few have 40 seconds to deliver acceptance speeches. If they forget, this giant, ominous, electronic hourglass is there to remind them.
5:28 p.m. — Because there’s nothing the Emmys love more than the Emmys, the audience is treated to clips from old shows during commercial breaks. That includes a vintage acceptance speech from firecracker Cloris Leachman. Shockingly, folks take this opportunity to pee.
5:58 p.m. — Leaving so soon? When William H. Macy loses the lead actor in a comedy race to perennial victor Jim Parsons, he and wife Felicity Huffman skip out of the Nokia. See you at the parties, guys!
6:41 p.m. — He may not have spoken onstage when The Normal Heart took best movie, but acclaimed playwright Larry Kramer did not travel out to Los Angeles for nothing. The 79-year-old, who has been in poor health for some time, receives the night’s first standing ovation for his landmark play and the three-decade battle to adapt it.
7:01 p.m. — Shortly after the entire Fargo team spends their allotted backstage chatter time talking about how cold it was filming in Alberta, Canada, Colin Bucksey unwittingly repeats their sentiments by talking about directing in boots. We get it; it was cold. Hollywood has spoiled us all.
7:05 p.m. — Cumberbitches, you might be tweeting into the abyss. Sherlock showrunner Steven Moffat says that the entire team avoids reading Tumblr and social media theories about the British series. Fanfic continues to fall on deaf ears.
7:09 p.m. — You don’t have to be 79 to get a standing ovation. Aaron Paul also receives one for his third and final win for playing Jesse Pinkman on the late Breaking Bad. At 34, that makes him the youngest actor to ever have three Emmys. Way to go, bitch.
7:22 p.m. — Erupting into chatter during every other commercial break of the night, the Emmy crowd is quiet in the moments following Billy Crystal‘s onstage tribute to the late Robin Williams.
7:25 p.m. — Backstage accepting for writing her HBO special We Are Miracles, Sarah Silverman downplays her red carpet admission that she brought pot to the Emmys. Oh, she brought it — “It’s legal!” — but she hadn’t smoked any yet. “I wasn’t stoned,” she said. “I don’t drink. I like to have a puff, as a treat, sometimes.”
7:29 p.m. — Stephen Colbert ain’t talkin’. When prodded about how The Late Show might look when he takes David Letterman‘s desk in 2015, the host is unusually lacking in words (and out of character). “More of the same, but different,” is all he promises. “We’ve still got four months of our show to do, and that takes 100 percent of my brain.”
7:36 p.m. — American Horror Story winner Kathy Bates, God love her, is still clearly annoyed with Harry’s Law getting canceled in 2012. “I was really gutted by that,” she says. “I thought, ‘What does this mean for my career? Is my career going to be over?'” Cleary not, Kathy.
7:42 p.m. — More vintage Emmy footage, including some awkward laughs for Kirstie Alley‘s infamous “I wanted to thank my husband, Parker, the man who has given me the big one for the last eight years” speech for Cheers. Her words endure, even if the marriage and subsequent series did not.
8:15 p.m. — NBC, TV Academy, and the actors aren’t mad at you about Monday! “The traffic was awesome,” says Julianna Margulies after the show, the first person ever to call traffic “awesome.” “This has been the smoothest, easiest Emmy experience I’ve ever had.”
8:22 p.m. — Can Modern Family get a sixth comedy win next year? Steven Levitan says they’re shifting direction, a reverse Shameless, if you will. “We just discussed a plotline having a big family dinner where Jay goes mad with a knife, so we’re working on that,” he says. “If that comes to be, we’re going to go full-on drama next year.”
8:35 p.m. — If there was any lingering speculation that Cary Fukunaga would return to True Detective, he put that to rest backstage. He brushed off recent plagiarism charges laid against showrunner Nic Pizzolatto. “You have to make fun of it,” he said. “You can’t take that stuff seriously.”
8:59 p.m. — Before leaving the backstage area and officially ending the Emmy portion of the Emmys, the cast of Breaking Bad hold court, trophies in hand, one last time. So naturally, everyone is talking about Bryan Cranston planting one on Julia Louis-Dreyfus. “I think it’s not a question of why and more a question of why not,” he says. “Yeeeeeah.”
Yeah, indeed, Bryan. Emmys out.
Click here to see the best and worst moments from Monday night’s ceremony.
A complete list of winners can be found here.
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