Good evening.
I have an announcement to make.
It all started with me bathing. Not really because I live in a tiny-ass NYC apartment...but in my head I'd like to embody this nice woman in a bath.
To be fair, I was just sitting at my computer when some random gay condescendingly told me, "Matt, sweetie, you really have to listen to this new Rita Ora song."
My initial response was, "Really, sweets?"
Because yes, I too was not "in the know."
I heard this song "How We Do?" years ago and thought it was a cute song. Rihanna really did that.
View this video on YouTube
But that was it.
A few years later, I heard about Rita Oro from Debra Messing.
And I'll never forget the "dropping my new song Monday" debacle of Oct. 2014.
Anyway, I remained unbothered and unconcerned about Rita Ora.
But that all changed last week. Not only did I morph into a completely different old lady stock photo actor, but I have also converted into a full blown Ritabot.
The conversion happened when I was sitting on my couch sipping my green tea, when some other gay sent me a link to a Rita Ora meme.
It was this:
Me trying to sing along to the post-chorus of Anywhere by Rita Ora.
The meme was funny. The song was good.
That brought me to do something I've never done: I went to YouTube and searched for Rita Ora. I found this song called "Anywhere" and shit, it's fucking good. Like really really fucking good.
View this video on YouTube
Then, I spiraled.
I realized, "Damn Rita, she's got bops!" I started listening to her song "Your Song" and yes, it too is very good.
View this video on YouTube
Finally, I ended up on "I Will Never Let You Down" and decided this was it.
View this video on YouTube
I have decided to stan.
Rita Ora has done it. Rita Ora has saved pop music. But seriously, listen to these songs. And to those existing Rita Ora fans out there, I have a message for you:
