How to own the room when there is no room

Humans are getting smarter at understanding how persuasion, influence and authority work. But when so much of the advice out there is focused on in-person meetings and conversations, how do we achieve those things from behind a screen? When we are in virtual meetings we lose natural cues and it can be difficult to follow what’s happening. It’s easier to get distracted and it’s harder to build trust. 

This challenge is only on the up. The number of home-workers has gone up by nearly a quarter of a million in the last decade and 50% of the UK workforce to work remotely by 2020. At NOBL, we often work remotely and it’s a challenge most of our clients are grappling with. For us, it’s trickiest during sales conversations and candidate interviews because these are conversations where stakes are high and trust is low. 

Here are some top tips to be effective and persuasive when you’re not able to interact in person.  

Establish rapport quickly

This is much harder when many social cues we depend upon are taken away. I tackle this by making an effort to ask questions like how has your day been? - being enthusiastic and present immediately. If you aren’t using video, you might want to pull up the person’s LinkedIn profile picture while you speak with them. If you are working remotely with your teammates, being on video can actually be a great equaliser 

“Instead of 9 people in a room together, reading each other’s body language, and one person halfway across the world stuck behind a screen, everyone is in the same boat. It’s a nice equalizer. Since everyone is just a postage stamp sized video on everyone else’s screen, there is very little raising of voices or aggressive body language. It’s harder for one or two people to dominate conversations this way.” Mike Davidson

Think about your environment 

Human beings are affected by our environments. You might want to think about the lighting, the background and how the space you are in is making you feel. After all, it’s much harder to close a sale or talk about your achievements when you are surrounded by empty pizza boxes or still have your pyjama trousers on. Mike Rundle, says; 

“What’s behind you on camera is almost as important as how you look. People naturally scan the room you’re in, so make sure everything they see on your video is what you want them to see, and reflects who you are and your personality.” 

Put your own distractions away

Give your full attention. Easy to say and hard to do but it’s vital for remote conversations. The person on the other end will be able to tell when you are not giving them your full attention. 

Warm-up your voice

Ever hop on a call when you haven’t spoken to anyone for 3 hours? Your voice sounds horrible! Your muscles need to warm-up before a run. Your voice needs to warm-up before a speech, presentation or call. There are a few vocal warm-ups online - singing a song is my favourite one. 

Stand or walk 

Standing or sitting with your back straight makes your voice stronger and more clear by allowing you to breathe deeper. When you do this, it creates more space in your chest, vocal cords and mouth. The more space you create in your body, the easier it is for you to get breath, volume and power behind your voice. If you can, stand while you talk on the phone.

Remember people can hear and see your mood 

Don’t check email right before getting on a call. You are bound to see something you don’t like. Put your phone away, don't dip into other social channels, do not disturb mode on your laptop can help too. Annoying pop-up notifications all stop you from being present. Emotions are contagious so be intentional about the energy you bring.

Look in the mirror

For calls where there is no video, you might want to look in the mirror at yourself whilst you are on the call. This makes you much more aware of your facial expression. Do you have the same expression on your face as you would if you knew the other person could see you, as in the face to face scenario? Are you focused on what is being said to you? Only by knowing what we do mostly subconsciously, will we be able to get even better! 

Be a facilitator 

It’s vital that remote calls stay on track and stay focused because it’s harder for people to stay connected and present. If people are starting to switch off or interrupt each other call it out - if you don’t, you’ll start to lose engagement quickly. 

Enthusiasm and levity

This rule applies to email too - unless you are a surgeon or doing some serious life and death work it helps to take yourself less seriously.

Use video whenever you can

We know that our ability to understand each other starts to diminish when we can’t see each other so turn your camera on.

Communicating remotely is complex, especially when building new relationships. Being more deliberate and intentional in the way that you show up will only serve you well. What’s your top tip for owning the room when there is no room? 

Thanks to Dan Blundell and my teammates at NOBL for their help with this article.