BF Application

Because so many of you men are trying to fight over me, I decided to help narrow things down in a much safer way... Then we'll let the finalists fight over me! Much fewer casualties that way you see. After all, I'm all about lessening the body count. Unless we're talking about zombies, demons, or clowns, in which case we want to kill as many as possible. -shudders- I hate clowns. Freaky little bastards. But I digress! Back to the application process.

We will start with a series of multiple choice questions. Please complete the sharpening of your #2 pencils before we begin. Fill in each bubble completely...wait, nope, nevermind. Just circle your choice, or fill in your answer where required. Please do not leave any answers blank or I'll feed your application to my zombie dogs.

1. Are you:
A. Male
B. Female

2. Are you single?
A. Yes
B. No
C. What she doesn't know won't hurt her.

3. How old are you? ____

4. Which do you prefer:
A. Pepsi
B. Coke
C. Vanilla Coke
D. Naked Juice
E. Alcohol

5. Sashimi is:
_______________________

6. What do you think of vampire/werewolf B-movies?
A. -groans-
B. The worse they are the more fun they are to watch.
C. Shoot me now.

7. Werewolf vs Vampire, who's better?
A. Vampire (as long as they don't sparkle)
B. Vampire
C. Werewolf
D. Um, they're not real...

8. Do you tweet?
A. Like a bird
B. WTF?
C. No
D. Occasionally

9. So how about those muppets?
____________________________________________

10. You're interested in this girl, she's interested in you. Would you hit on her best friend if the opportunity arose & you didn't think she'd find out?
A. Hell no
B. The more the merrier
C. Yeah, but only if I knew she wouldn't find out.
D. Maybe, is her friend hot?

11. You haven't heard from the girl you like in awhile, do you:
A. Contact her and see what's up.
B. Wait for her to initiate conversation.
C. Ask her friends if they've heard anything.

12. Who was your favorite Power Ranger? (Bonus points if you can match a name to the color)
A. Red
B. Black
C. Green/White
D. Pink
E. Yellow
F. Blue


And so ends the multiple choice portion of our questions. Now we'll move onto the essays.

Please use proper grammar and complete sentences or your application will be used as a cage lining for my parakeet.

Tell me a bit about yourself. Likes, dislikes, pets, etc. Anything you want me to know, this is your chance.

The zombies are invading and its time to change into your ass-kicking gear. What do you wear?

What's your idea of a perfect first date?

Explain the inherent value of bunny rescuing. (why should it be done, etc)

I'm not feeling well, what will you do to make me feel better?


And that is the end of the essay portion. If there's anything else you would like to add, feel free to do so now.

Finally I just need some personal information and a photo(for categorization purposes of course)

Height:
Eye color:
Hair color:
Shoe size:
What type of phone do you use:
And what's the best way to contact you for further information/interviews?

Thanks and good luck. Please, one cookie per applicant. Purchase not necessary, but buying me things will most certainly increase your odds of being chosen (I love Netflix subscriptions).